Make up stuffs

The other day I happened to meet one of my so called friend's aunt during lunch and no surprisingly like any other aunt she started with marriage topic..And my friend happened to be searching for a girl by the way and he is looking for a naturally beautiful girl..Now you must be wondering what the hack is that naturally beautiful girl..Well no surprise but a girl who looks beautiful without make up that's what according to many people a naturally beautiful girl in India..

Alrite I deffinitely don't have any problem with what my friend is looking for but I deffinitely have a problem with this "naturally beautiful girl concept"..To many it will come as no surprise that many Indian guys actually look for this no make up beautiful girls. Alrite I agree there may be few girls like that who are naturally very beautiful and blessed with good skin..But does it mean that rest all who doesn't have a good skin or features they don't have any right to look and feel good?? Do they mean to be neglected and rejected ??

Now if a girl with little make up on looks more beautiful and feel more confident is there suppose to be any harm about it..Haven't all these guys who look for these naturally beautiful girls not aware that even Cleopatra used to do make up and take bath in goats milk etc to look beautiful..Obviously with pollution and today's environment girls skin might go for a toss..Hence for that reason only if a girl goes to parlour means that's all..There only all you guys will pass comment "fresh out of parlour stuff","let it rain than all the make up will go"..Gosh!!..

Now the hunt for naturally beautiful girls goes to the extent of not looking for girls during other's marriage day..It seems there will be lights and even a worst girl will look beautiful in any marriage function/party etc since she will put her make up on..It seems girls should be seen first in the morning when they are about to brush their teeth when she puts no make up on..Now is that humanely possible to find a girl who is brushing her teeth and a guy spots her and says she is the most beautiful girl without make up..Is make up is like a musk that it will completely disguise someone's bad appearance..kudos to Indian man really..

I have observed that in abroad wearing make up is actually considered as a girl is grown up and they attend their puberty stuff etc..Here its like a taboo..A girl if she wears make up and perfume means for guys it will be like she is smelling floral from two kilometers of radius and all..
More than often I have also seen guys saying that a girl who looks good even in the worst of cotton saalwar means that girl is actually born beautiful..what do you think of girls man?? A girl who doesn't do anything, wear worst piece of dress and still look beautiful is this actually justified..??..Every individual has the freedom to chose whatever dress suites them and looks beautiful in them is the right attire for them..Now you will say no no girls tend to hide their wrong flabby spots through few dresses..what rubbish..Aren't a human being suppose to look good despite of their faults..Is all human being perfect..

These are few thoughts that always disturbed me and number of times I hear from people such things my inner voice somehow never agrees to such bullshits..That doesn't mean that I am preaching Feminism and stuffs..This has deffinitely nothing to do with Feminism ideologies etc..But some thoughts just simply original and my views for sure..

Are you dieting....

Gosh I am kinda so used to this statement now that I have started saying yes as an answer..Alrite here are the things..when you are eating the amount as a person that's good enough for you than its like "you are dieting huh"..

Well it all starts with lunch in office..You bring that big Tupperware tiffin box with variety of dishes in them made by your wife and in front of it if I eat a plate of 2 rotis and sabji deffinitely it will look small isn't it..Its like drawing a big line in alignment with an existing line.Now thats when you all will pull my leg "oh how can you survive by eating such little food"..Dude you should eat the amount that's suitable for your body..Not to forcefully eat..If you are eating something healthy and more energetic than just making you heavy and drowsy kinda food that means "you are dieting huh"..Please give me a break..

Of course we should eat but if you avoid something junk that means" dieting huh" ..This "Dieting" has become like a leg pulling or rather underestimating kinda statement for people who loves to hog.Well few interesting stories..Now I have observed Indian people who goes abroad specially those European countries makes fun of their food style ..Dude this is how you are suppose to eat.That's why they live for more than 80 years in average than we Indians..The Indians going there will have to find a place for daal chawal stores else they cant survive..And if you ask them they will say :" No baba I cant eat those raw salads and vegetables.."

One more thing If I tell someone that I go to a gym that's all..Oh you are trying to be Bipasha huh..I don't wana be Bipasha but I deffinitely want to be healthy and fit..For that I eat more healthy which is an offense to many since I might not be eating the regular gheewala chapaties and butter chicken masala..

Oh by the way if you eat more and become little plump than the same people will call you "aunty"..Well I sincerely don't think that's a bad terminology..Here in India girls who are not in their 20's normally termed as aunty's and that's like a underestimating statement by guys just to let the girl down..Means you are aunty and you are no more attractive or belong to that league of young girls who are more attractive.. I have seen generally that a guy no matter what age he is he can still call a girl looking little more than age 20 as aunty in their so called group gossips..

Oh one more thing if you are getting aged that means you are suppose to look your age..otherwise " dude now a days girls,not even able to make their age,kudos to parlours"..Well now if you don't look your age than its a good thing rite..There only all you people start your leg pulling "dieting I guess" " dieting hard"..Now suppose you diet suppose and look young and feel good and more confident whats the harm about??


I am done with all this and now yes you already know my answer " Are you dieting"?? well "yes I am"..

Being Single..

All the single girls who are single either by compulsion or by choice I am telling you its the best stage one should enjoy..And when I say this I mean it..Well being over 25, I am now the mausi-bua etc of many officially married folks in our society..well now you will be thinking how do I come to know about being mausi -bua good news etc..well thanks to our social networking sites where they post their new born,genuinely unoffensive cute ones..And the status of these sites are even more playful for many of them.Technically speaking how does that matter if you are putting your status as in relationship with so and so or complicated etc..Are these status to barr people that dont even dare to propose me I am in a committed relationship or rather to confuse someone by stating that its complicated..huh..oh well I forgot to mention one more aspect of these relationship status..while being in relation means you are committed that also indicates that you are harmless now..Being single is the worst thing because its suppose to be a threat to the someone's fiance,girlfriend etc..By mistake if a single girl posts an wall post in the guy in relationship ..That's all..

And the profile snap of these married ones..Gosh we know you are married baba..Your relationship status is publicly visible..Despite of that also they will put a profile picture of both of them holding each other..I so wish to see the same pic even after 25th year of their marriage in Facebook..And all you single girls you must have already got the picture what it will be..

And the saturday or sunday afternoon dont even ask what a trauma it is to order food..I am a small person who eats small portion obviously.."Mam sorry we serve only meals above 250 for home delivery".."Sory we dont serve single portions"...Now how a single prson can order above 250 size of food!!

And than here comes the scene while renting a house to a single girl..Sample questions are " why are you not married?"Are you not going be scared alone..Dude if I would have been scared than would I have first of all decided to go for a single accommodation??

My neighbor cracked the biggest joke the other day..Here comes the deewali day and he came to wish..A young sardarji working in a telecom company I thought that he will be perhaps globalised..well its not necessarily true that if a person working for a global company his/her mind will be globalised too..anyways the biggest shock came to me when he said that "may be when a girl staying alone like this people might not think that you are a good girl"..well if I had athe tag of a married girl whose husband is working in some other part of the country people might not think that she is a bad girl since she has the stamp of this red powder popularly known as sindoor..I answered to him" well if you think being single and staying alone is a matter of choice to me..I would rather be single but never marry a guy like you who has got such a narrow and weird mindset"..And no need to say his face was worth looking at that time..

I tell you all you single girls dont even bother..This is not the world for all these officially married and unofficially flirt people..we are here to prove everyone wrong and create a better society..Hope this helps..

Marriage stuffs..

"You are not yet married??".Well many who might be wondering,that's the very obvious question that I face most of the time,and yes associated with that the question "why" too..I happened to face this so much that I am now compulsively confessing my whole overview  towards this marriage stuff..We live in this society where a girl crossing 25 means she is  over aged for so called marriage institution..And ironically statistics says fascination for younger girl is even more interesting in marriage market .Its like buying fresh stock of vegetable in the market the younger it is more sale able it is..lol..yes that's true!!

And yes how can we forget about being fair skinned.."Is your girl fair or extra fair??" is more popular in the questionaire of the so called Groom side than how qualified she is..And to bring more irony the Fair and Lovely product advertisement is even more funny..where a girl having more demand in marriage market after applying this product because she is fair now and confident more.Alas more than 60 years of Indian independence and yet shocked to see the craze of fairness product in Indian stores..It looks like Indian mindset is yet to be out of that colonial imperialism when it comes to girls..A girl fair means she is Radha..and a guy can afford to be dark because lord Krishna was shyama means dark..!!

I happened to read Shobha de's book "The spouse..The truth about marriage"and really there are so many things that goes beyond marriage..And I am surprised that when it comes searching a girl for marriage it is the basic requirements that she needs to be beautiful,a cook,fair skinned and oh yeah most importantly HOMELY...lol..I can write a whole book on this topic though..

She needs to be a combination of being modern and traditional values..Now guys please find out what does that mean..What I derive from this statement is that the girl needs to be confused..Isn't that what it means..See either she is traditional or modern now where do you get this hybrid of mix of traditional and modern values only god knows or the person concerned..

Oh yeah I happen to read so many postings in Facebook by my male friends that husbands are not atm machine and stuff..well where did that come from..If you think a girl needs to be homely than is it not what you men only invented that a guy needs to be the provider of financial support to the family and the women takes care of home or more specifically kitchen and children etc..Now when the women is expecting to get her a small gift you think that husbands are not atm machine!!

The other day I was spending some time at of my aunt's place..she recently gone through uterus removal surgery due to cancer and do you guys wana know what uncle's statement was when he met me??.." I made her men now..".It was like someone poked me with a knife..Will a women's immotions and her kind heartedness as a women will be removed from her heart if her uterus which is the so called child producing organ is removed?? How harsh a person can be to make such statements!!

Yes women in our society still needs to go through such things in life..Marriage as a social institution is loosing its charm because of number of divorce cases and yet living together is not legal in India..we Indians would love to live an indignified life, yet not agree to come out of our hyppocracy..I really honour Raja Ram mohan Rai who in the renaissance period of India did try to usher some of worst Indian cruel traditional practices..India needs yet another Ram mohan Rai..

Ek cup chai and a boho girl..

Three of my close friends happened to have a small chai party at my place today..Its so nice to find friends of same thinking and that's probably the reason why we are still friends..

I always had this wild fascination towards leading a boho life..A free spirited and gypsy me thrills me like anything..I want to go to a strange unknown place out of country where no one knows me and I don't know anyone.I want to visit those countryside of UK and do peddy field work..Earn in penny and be happy..Eat a burger and a coke and survive and roam around..Meet good people who are unconditional and make them my friends forever..I want to be a complete stranger yet find my own identity in an unknown town..I want to experience those native countryside culture of a strange country and live with the strangers..Well so many wishes that I have..I don't know why the boho life thrills me like anything..My friends and I agreed that we will visit such exotic places and lead a life even for may be a month but at our own condition..In life we end up living our life mostly because of others,whether its our parents or because of society etc..Or perhaps that's how our Indian culture is..

But that's not what I want to..I am an independent bird..I want to live my life in my own condition no matter even if I can find a month to live like that than I would never have any regret..I really don't know for what reason but somewhere I feel I am getting more complex day by day and more professional in my behaviour..That's a sign of maturing as my friends said..That's true but I think I was at my best when I was in my teen age when I use to be what I am rather that what the situation demands.Still more years to go and if I grow complex day by day than I will no longer be what I am..I can not kill myself like this..I will have to come out of that complex me..A Bohemian me who is so free spirited a laid back I need to find that in me..And my friends kept the discussion on what can we do about it and I sneaked to prepare for another cup of hot masala chai....

A beautiful movie I know and you know too..

Daydream delusion
Limousine Eyelash
Oh, baby with your pretty face
Drop a tear in my wineglass
Look at those big eyes
See what you mean to me
Sweet cakes and milkshakes

I am a delusion angel
I am a fantasy parade
I want you to know what I think
Don’t want you to guess anymore
You have no idea where I came from
We have no idea where we’re going
Launched in life
Like branches in the river
Flowing downstream
Caught in the current
I’ll carry you. You’ll carry me
That’s how it could be
Don’t you know me?
Don’t you know me by now?

Remember this poem??? Well yes you guessed it right from the movie named Before Sunrise released in 1995, the only movie to get a rare rating of 100% from Rotten Tomatoes .. Love, life, self-fulfillment and self-discovery are few things that describes this movie which was originally inspired by a women whom Richard Linklater the writer /director met in a toy shop in Philadelphia city.There are very few movies that makes a mark in your life and yes deffinitely this movie is one of them for me.

The plot is very simple though.It starts with Jesse a young American (Ethan Hawke) meeting Celine (Julie Delphie ) a French women in a Eurail from Budapest.Jesse is going to Vienna to catch a flight to United States and Celine is returning back to Paris after visiting her grandmother.The movie starts with a conversation that strikes between both .I always thought and agreed that a beautiful conversation is always a first step to any kinda relation..This is exactly how it happens in this movie.While they were nearing Vienna Jesse reveals that he has a flight to catch from Vienna next day early morning and he would be delighted if Celine joins him just to spend some time roaming around the beautiful city Vienna.He doesn’t have much money to stay in a hotel and that why the plan was to roam around the city whole night and talk with each other..Jesse finally convinces Celine to come with him and this is when the actual movie begins to spread its fragrance.

As they were roaming around the city they started conversing more openly and about the topics like love,life,religion and their observations about the city etc. After visiting a few landmarks in Vienna, they share a kiss at the top of the Wiener Riesenrad Ferris Wheel at sunset and start to feel a romantic connection.when they were roaming around they started to talk more openly with each other and more deeper level of conversation striked..Celine revealed that her boyfriend broke off with her because he thought that she loved him too much.While Jesse told that he willingly escaped from her girlfriend who was trying to avoid him while he came to visit her all the way from US to Madrid.

While they were walking along the side of Danube Canal they came across a beggar who instead of asking for money asked for a deal that he will ask for a word about which he will write a poem for them and if they think that the poem is worth than they will pay him whatever they feel like. Jesse and Celine goes for the word Milk shake and soon the poem “Dillusion Angel ” was presented by the person.

They admit their attraction to each other and how the night has made them feel, though they understand that they probably will not see each other again when they leave.They decided to utilise the best of the time they have and finally end the night with a sexual encounter.In fact Jesse reveals during their closeness that given a choice he would have married her right away instead of never seeing her again.

The movie ends with their promise to each other that they will meet in the same place after six months next day in a railway station while they were about to leave each other.

The film is actually an understanding between two partners in a world which is itself unknowable, and over which one can exercise no control.This is depicted throughout the movie.While they visit the cemetery of no name they embrace their own life.The movie has lot to say about many unknown aspect of life and love and relationship..

That a relationship which is so unknowable to each other and over which one can exercise no control can be of such importance no one knew.That two complete stranger can be of perfect match in thinking and share the greatest level of togetherness is what the film is about.Honestly speaking each time I see the movie there is always something new that I discover out of it.There is lot to learn about love,relationship and many more unknown fact of life which can only be experience through the journey of the these two characters Jesse and Celine..!!!

Something about Glass ceiling...

And I always used to think that glass ceiling in corporate world is disappearing.But today I am contradicting my own belief..Yes!! That’s a hard reality though.When we talk about glass ceiling in corporate world perhaps that’s a micro perspective of Indian culture.A country even after liberating since half century,that like almost even after two generations elapsed still under the shadow of these myths and beliefs.Well the tale begins with me here.I have grown up in a relatively liberal environment while my mother is a working women and me being the only child indeed I gained lot of freedom.Perhaps my mother being my sole authority in life I have never actually given much attention to the need of a father figure or more particularly a male figure.A society more authoritatively known as patriarchal society like India women definitely struggling in the race of male chauvinism..

Well .well.Reality is reality.No matter what..I am quite thankful to my mother who has actually raised me up without such bias and with a relatively sound qualification.However India’s globalization in 90’s and its open sky policy though has opened or rather flooded India with lot of MNC’s at the same time the mindset of Indian people are I guess yet to be globalized properly. And when I talk about mindset it doesn’t not necessarily mean feminist preachings or anything such stuffs..Well the famous movie “Before sunrise” actually somehow relates to what Celine had to say about Feminism and she says” Feminism actually is a notion created by men initially to fulfill their own self-centered interest” “women free your body,free your mind ,sleep with me..”ha ha ha..and here I am not talking about any of those or many be I respect what perhaps she means by..

However when I talk about Glass ceiling essentially I mean the obstacles a female goes through in every scale when there is scope of growth within an organization..And here I am not talking about the traditional bureaucratic govt organization..More particularly referring to the corporate in India..I happen to face several such incidents in my own career.while on the one hand I can be privileged to work for so called MNC,at the same time I faced the rude realities where despite of my efforts I have been cruelly subdued..Well that too for what reason and the answers are because “Aiyyo she is too too dominating” “Da she is very aggressive da ” ”Aah this is not a female job,”,”Aiyyo don’t ask da she is trying to teach everyone” .."She doesnt come in traditional attire da"..oh yeah traditional attire essentially means salwar clad etc..

I wonder are so called aggression or domination terminologies don’t have any positive word to replace ..And I guess yes. Being proactive and result oriented is very often replaced as being dominating and aggressive by so called Indian male boss..Atleast to the male bosses that I was reporting to..I was cruelly suppressed not to talk during meetings just to be humble and polite..Well humble and polite again are terminologies that has different meaning when it comes to Indian context.Indian women are not suppose to talk no matter she might be having great ideas during senior level meeting.And if she does it that’s all..Oh that lady is too much,she just put forward her ideas..Well at the end of the day the business came from such ideas and thankfully the ideas were exchanged atleast.

Really lot of such stuffs..where to end I have no clue..I have raised up hearing stories from my mother how she actually brought me up since I was a  kid till I was a teenage,that she was a working lady and that how she faced lot of such obstacles by the so called male managers etc..Now even after generation passed I am facing the same issues..

I sincerely wonder when these kind of mindset will disappear in our society and when Indian women will gain actual equality in our society..Leaving you all with that thought:-)